Rules to Parenting

Jordan had a doctor’s appointment on Tuesday. He was 6 pounds 1 ounce last Wednesday night, and Tuesday of this week he was 6 pounds 13 ounces. He was also 20 inches long. The appointment was mostly getting to know each other. We met him for the first time, and he wanted to know about Jordan from our point of view. He already spoke to the neonatologist over the phone, but frankly she saw Jordan about 15 minutes a week. He did say some weird stuff though. He said, at least for right now, no water. I used to give him some water if he was hungry in between meal times. The doctor said no water, just feed him. We also asked him about solving the wrong problem and he solved it. As I mentioned last time, he doesn’t burp quickly sometimes. Sometimes it takes over 15 minutes – something that can be a pain in the butt at 3 am. We asked him about getting him to burp easier. The doctor said to sit him upright for 20 or 30 minutes and he’ll burp on his own. While he has been correct, the only reason I need him to burp faster is so I can get back to sleep sooner. Now, overnight feedings take up to an hour. I should have asked how to make the baby burp faster. I would like for all of us to now take a moment to consider the plight of parents of multiples. I honestly don’t know how you do it.

There are two rules to being a good parent. Rule 1 is have a plan. A baby needs to be bathed, clothes need to be washed, bottles sanitized, diapers changed, and a million other things. If you don’t have a plan or a schedule, you are lost. Rule 2 is that the entire reason the baby exists is to ruin your schedule. Last night Jordan had the nerve to get hungry at 2 am last night, a full hour early! We were supposed to do tummy time yesterday afternoon. He slept from noon until midnight! Outrageous! The time I was supposed to use to fix adult dinner I had to use to get diaper rash cream and we had to eat take out. Preposterous! No worries though. I included some of my caffeine pills in this morning’s bottle. He’ll certainly wake up today. I’m just kidding of course, I can’t afford to give away any of my caffeine pills. They are what is getting me through my day.

My dad made a video of the baby for those who are interested. If you want a copy of the video email a message to jordanvid@gmail.com. He’ll reply with a copy of the video. This isn’t spam and we aren’t trying to sell you anything. If you want to see to video though, you have to send the email.

I need to send a special thanks to my wife. She is the reason that Jordan is here today. She knew there was a problem and wouldn’t listen to my reassurances. She spent 11 days on bed rest in the hospital. She has endured countless injections and i.v.’s in order to have the baby. Anyone who has had to do it will tell you that giving birth at 23 weeks is a lot more painful than giving birth at 40 weeks. I know that she wouldn’t let me list half of the stuff she had to put up with over the last several years to get to this point. I know that some of the stuff she’s had to do has caused her to face some of her biggest fears. You have spent most of the last week worrying yourself with everything from apnea alarms, to bubbles in the formula, and how dirty the diapers are. Just know that I don’t worry about these things as much because I have total faith that you are and will forever be a great mommy. I don’t know any woman that has done more to become a mother, and no woman deserves it more. I know that with the sleep deprivation I haven’t shown it lately, but my love for you grows by the day. Thank you.